Holding a child allows you to accomplish so much. Do we need to carry our children all the time? A hug is an antidote for even the deepest pain, and this is a particular time when we want nothing more than to hold our little ones close. What are some ways parents can set boundaries?
Image Credit: Pexels/Arina Krasnikova
Getting Attached To The Extremes
Momfluencers constantly remind parents to hold their kids for their long-term development. People are now being mom-shamed for using strollers in multiple videos on TikTok. Skin-to-skin contact has been shown to help regulate a newborn’s heart rate and nervous system by allowing them to lie unclothed on a caregiver’s chest for some time. Throughout the mid-20th century, John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth developed attachment theory to show that the earliest emotional bonds are critical for healthy development.
Prioritizing Quality Over Quantity
Psychologist Diana Divecha, an assistant clinical professor, tells Yahoo Life that secure attachment is not a result of any particular set of practices but rather the quality of relationships. It is highly correlated with our nervous systems. She adds that attachment parenting practices do not always prevent a child from developing a secure attachment to a caregiver. To establish a secure attachment, it is not only OK to put your children down, but it may be necessary.
Image Credit: Pexels/Mart Production
Creating Boundaries Around Touch
We don’t have to carry our crawlers, toddlers, and little kids all the time – but try telling them that when they’re still too young to talk. Children’s development specialist and psychologist Siggie Cohen believe parents should remind themselves that boundaries aren’t about rejecting or abandoning their children. Setting boundaries around touching and holding our children can serve as a way to teach them how to cope with challenges and changes as whole people.