Everybody has an opinion about how to raise kids, and parents and even grandparents are often willing to share their thoughts. It’s hard not to get upset when someone criticizes your parenting style or if they disagree with how you want to raise your children, whether you’re a new parent or an experienced parent with multiple children.
iHus, specializing in multigenerational living, found that disagreements over parenting techniques are the most common cause of parent-parent arguments. According to therapist Siobhan Butt, a member of the Counselling Directory, a person’s parenting style may differ from their own.
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Parenting styles can manifest in all situations, from what you feed your children to how much screen time you let them have to your political and religious beliefs. The top areas of disagreement were discipline, meals and snacks, TV or screen time, manners, health and safety, treating some grandchildren differently, bedtime, and sharing photographs or information online.
It’s probably time to talk to your parents if they’re doing things that go against how you parent – or making comments about your parenting style that are pretty negative. Butt, who runs Revive Relationships, said having this conversation is always best. If you need advice in a particular situation, you will ask them for it. Be open, tell them how you feel, and show them that you value their experience and wisdom.
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She cautions, however, to be gentle with them. They may not be malicious and have the best intentions for you. It might be a good idea, said Butt, to explain that while you respect and value their input, you disagree with what they did. Please let them know you would appreciate it if they could refrain from doing this in the future.
Your grandparents are crucial in raising your children, just like they did for you. Many grandparents will drop everything to spend time with their grandkids.